When you come to this state... Are you sane?
Uneasy. A feeling I usually get when I'm not in the mood to communicate. Well, to me that is. I wonder if its the same to others.
It was just one of those days that you think everything started out so well. You feel refreshed the minute you wake up. You feel the urge to do anything and everything for the day. But then again, something just comes in which alters all moods that have been preset for the entire day.
If there's anything someone would hate that much, that'd be to be the state of not being stable. In this case, not being able to control your own line of direction.
Oh yesh... *sarcasm =_="
As I lay still in my ever so stirred up murky watered fish tank, I realize somethings, there are just some times when you think you're losing grip. And yes, it sucks to know that you have no control over your sad excuse for your own life.
Oh I just remembered, I haven't vented out on some issues happening to my blasted life. >_< "Your SANITY is in question".
And for who knows how long all this crap will last you? 10 lifetimes? 20 even. And what the heck can you do about it?
Nostalgia... That sweet poison everyone seems to drink every once in a while.
And I had my fill. XD
I never new staying at home on a weekday can be so stress releiving. All i did was slouch on a sofa, have a few bags of chips beside me, hold the TV remote control, and mindlessly surf along the channels. And guess what I ended up with? Two full hours of clay animated cartoons and a few episodes of "Care Bares". XD
My last blog update was when? o_O
I've been trying to squeeze time to get back here and collect my thoughts. I landed a bit late I think.
Having been through a lot of deep sh*tty situations, I finally land back and think of what I've been doing for the past couple of weeks. I've been abusing my self to a point that I almost dropped dead on a curb. Having been deprived of proper sleep and rest, I resort to a few things where I gained a lot of very well said comments from friends.
The Rubik's Cube.
Despite the fact that I'm wallowing in my stirred up murky watered fish tank, trying to wash my thoughts out (which is a fact that I am mot enjoying =_=), I'm still troubled by my previous actions. Which resulted to me picking up this contraption called the Rubik's Cube.
Six sides, six colors, nine pannels a side. Turn each and every side, flip, rotate, switch and swatch the colors. But did you ever wonder? Why you could fix it or why you can't? The thing is, it has a pattern. It has this thing that you should follow. I'm not going to refer to it as a rule. Rather, let's call it a method. A type of counting and manner of how you hold it.
Odd? Its what I've been lacking. My grasp of things hasn't been that firm. Even my methods are a bit astray. It's just not working for me. And I have no idea why I'm being so unstable. And I haven't been myself lately. Insane? Nope. Just deranged. Too much to think about. Too many to consider.
You'll either make it better or make it worse.
When you're asked a simple question, you sometimes give a complex answer. Sometimes you even lead them to falcity. Most of the times you resort to silence, and not telling.
We know that telling the truth will do good. We know that it will help benefit a cause. But sometimes the truth just isn't the right thing to say. The truth hurts those we care for. When we least expect it to hurt them. The more it hurts them. And the more we realize that we shouldn't have said anything. We shouldn't have said the truth.
